Joke Nov 30th
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Q: What is the difference between men and women:....
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need... A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
Monica Lewinsky was walking on the beach when she found a lantern washed up on the shore. She started to rub it and out popped a genie. "Oh goodie, now I will get three wishes!" she exclaimed. "No," said the genie, "You have been very bad this year, and because of this, I can only give you one wish."
"Let's see," says Monica, "I don't need fame, because I have plenty of that due to all of the media coverage. And I don't need money, because after I write my book, and do all my interviews, I'll have all the money I could ever want. I would like to get rid of these love handles, though. Yes, that's it, for my one wish, I would like my love handles removed."
And, poof, just like that, her ears were gone!
Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes. It's our job to stomp them, and then keep them in the dark until they mature. And hopefully they'll turn out to be something we would like to have dinner with.
Men-tal Anxiety. . . Men-opause. . . Men-tal Breakdown. Ever notice that all problems start with MEN?
Slogans for new condoms from familiar USA Brands
Budwiser Condoms:- This bud's for you
Burger King Condoms:- Home of the Whopper
Gatorade Condoms:- The thirst Quencher
Ball Park Franks Condoms:- They plump when you use em
Charmin Condoms:- Don't squeeze the Charmin
Imagine if major companies from all around the world started producing orsponsoring condoms. They would become fashionable and companies would probably advertise moreopenly. Imagine the trademarks:
Nike Condoms : - Just do it.
Toyota Condoms : - Oh.. what a feeling.
Ford Condoms : - The ride of your life.
Sony Condoms : - Do not underestimate the power of Sony Condoms.
Microsoft Condoms : - Where do you want to go today ?
KFC Condoms : - Finger Licking Good.
M&Ms Condoms : - Melt in your mouth, not in your hands.
Coca-Cola Condoms : - The Real Thing.
Ever-Ready Condoms : - Keep going and going ....
Macintosh Condoms : - It does more, it costs less, it's that simple.
Pringles Condoms : - Once you pop, you can't stop.
Marlboro Classic : - Fits The Man